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Author Topic: Jokes  (Read 28826 times)
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EvilGinger
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« Reply #45 on: 13 June 2011, 05:09:16 »

By day, he was an ordinary farm hand, tending the flocks. But by night, he lived a double life as an infamous secret agent.
They called him... The Shepherd Spy.

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« Reply #46 on: 13 June 2011, 11:54:15 »

what do you get if you put a duck a plate & a Cat into evilgingers combinatron?
I dont know what do you get

A Duck Billed platy puss of course  Laughing 6


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Oskar
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« Reply #47 on: 13 June 2011, 19:28:01 »

What happened to the Irish housewife when ironing her curtains.........





She fell out of the window !!








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« Reply #48 on: 13 June 2011, 20:41:37 »

RoFL!!! Laughing 6

Hi Oskar

Have you heard the one about the piece of wood which got thrown out of a pub for being a bit of a plank

or the one about a piece of string who got into a row & was told to get knotted?

or the piece of rope which went to the hairdresser and was told it had frayed ends?

or the diced carrot who split up with her boyfriend I am told that she was very cut up about it.


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EvilGinger
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« Reply #49 on: 20 June 2011, 12:03:51 »

Heard the one about the nut & bolt who went out on the tiles & both got spannered!!!


well you have now


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CrazyFrog
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Smile and Wave Boys, Smile and Wave


« Reply #50 on: 24 June 2011, 17:45:18 »

A real classic I heard yesterday.

What is the most stupidest thing in the forest?

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« Reply #51 on: 24 June 2011, 20:54:15 »

I dont know what is the stupidest thing in the forest?


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Smile and Wave Boys, Smile and Wave


« Reply #52 on: 24 June 2011, 23:14:01 »

You're going to love the answer.

I hope everyone's humor is online lol.

Ready?

The answer is  An Octopus.
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« Reply #53 on: 25 June 2011, 02:49:19 »

 Laughing 6 Laughing 6 Laughing 6 Laughing 6

Just the thing to cheer me up when the IDIOT next Door has woken me up

 
when asked by the  Walnut, what did the young Chestnut call his great grand mother?


 
A very old chestnut of course


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« Reply #54 on: 25 June 2011, 05:41:30 »

There are 10 types of people in the world ...................... Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Q: How many lead singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One, He just holds it up in the light socket and the world revolves around him

Q: What is worse than a locked room full of angry psychopaths?

A: One angry psychopath with a key

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« Reply #55 on: 27 June 2011, 19:57:52 »

Fractious kid I want  a wee
irritated mother No you cant we only got you an X box last week!

inspired by the latest episode of I’m Sorry I Haven’t a Clue

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006qnwb

to hear it now.


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Smile and Wave Boys, Smile and Wave


« Reply #56 on: 28 June 2011, 01:15:24 »


Two fish in a tank.

One turns to the other and says

Can you drive this thing?


From Penn & Teller Fool Us, last Saturday.

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« Reply #57 on: 28 June 2011, 02:58:48 »

Q: Why was Boris Johnson staring at the carton of orange juice?

A: Because it said concentrate

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« Reply #58 on: 28 June 2011, 04:46:56 »

Heard the one about the  Yugioh player that won 12 million pounds on the Euro millions lottery? he went to collect his winnings & was told he couldn't have them all at once as even the main post office didn't have that much cash at any one time. they offered him 2million now 2 million tomorrow & the remaining 8 next week. He took one look at them and said nah' is your going to mess me about I will just have me two quid back...


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« Reply #59 on: 13 July 2011, 11:14:47 »

what about the man who tried to cross a sheep dog with a Jelly but found he couldent as he got the collie wobbles.


or the man hit in the head by s sweet during a food fight I hear he sustained a trifling injury.

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